What Excuses Will Herman Cain Dish Out Today?

Here is Cain's accuser, Sharon Bialek, telling an all too sordid and familiar tale of sexual assault in the workplace (fired employee seeking to get her job back qualifies) involving an inappropriate power relationship between a boss and a subordinate, in which the boss seeks sexual favors in exchange for a job, a promotion, or some special financial consideration. Willing subordinates (and they do exist, as the thorny legal issue of sorting out what is rape or sexual assault versus a "consensual" relationship will attest) might as well cut to the chase and avoid "misunderstandings" by carrying a sign which says: "WILL GIVE BLOW JOB FOR 15% RAISE AND/OR REGULAR JOB."

 

Kidding, of course ... sort of. Similar arrangements proliferate on the internet, typically between "sugar daddies" (or mommas) and students saddled with ginormous student loan debt. If you lack an athletic skill, sex is often the fall-back position. And even in the now infamous Penn State athletics (football) program, a sexual predator is allowed to ply his sickening child sexual abuse while remaining an upstanding member of the college jocks elite. The evidence of abuse was there, in disturbing plain sight. The janitor who witnessed one such incident and reported it, a Korean War veteran, was so distressed his friends thought he was on the verge of a heart attack. But those in power turned a blind eye. Legendary Penn State coach Joe Paterno, whose record as winningest college football coach will forever and appropriately be defined by this nearly unspeakable sex scandal, did only enough to pass the buck upstairs to administration, and stay out of legal trouble. The child predator, coach Jerry Sandusky, used a "charity" for disadvantaged children which he founded to take his pick of the victims — like a priest to his altar boys. Sandusky even took one of the children he was sexually abusing to church. The first thing that comes to mind is, was it the Catholic Church?

J'accuse. I accuse Republicans of promoting prostitution by killing off the American dream of an affordable college education for the middle class and the poor. I accuse Republicans of turning a once great nation into a huge whorehouse in which money and power relationships rule. I accuse Republicans of neutering government to protect the rich and the powerful instead of the weak and the poor, of coddling the money changers and turning Wall Street, the Temple of American Capitalism, into a den of thieves. Rachel hosted Bishop Gene Robinson of the Episcopal Diocese of New Hampshire, for her interview last night. He spoke of his experience among the Occupy Wall Street movement. We could use more Episcopal, more genuine Jesus, and a lot less Catholic and evangelical in our spiritual, economic, cultural and political lives. Watch:

So what will Herman Cain say today in his defense, other than "I didn't do it" — what can he say? The day after I wrote "[b]ack in the day, when journalism still existed within a written and unwritten code of ethics, there were, to my mind, only three types of anonymous or confidential sources which journalists were honor-bound to protect with their lives" ... [cont. below], Herman Cain testily told reporters to go "check the journalistic code of ethics." As if he knew such a thing existed or could tell the difference between the journalistic code of ethics and his own. I wrote that in a broader context which had little to do with Cain, because I also wrote, with my usual incisiveness, "[l]et's face it: Conventional wisdom holds that these sexual harassment accusations may well sink the Cain campaign, such as it is" and "[g]iven my low opinion of Herman Cain — which goes for all Republicans, because in my "Christian" world I consider a person's character to be inextricably linked to how they treat the least among us; and to be a Republican you must accept unacceptable things, so you're all going to Hell — personally, I have little doubt there's plenty of damning evidence that he actually sexually harassed those two women, just as Clarence Thomas sexually harassed Anita Hill."

This blog is also known as the Zeitgeist Formulator, we're cutting edge, we cut to the chase and the heart of the matter and boldly go where others dare not venture. So at the risk of providing the Herman Cain campaign with new excuses for obfuscation, these are Cain's limited options, as I see it:

(1) Deny everything; standard reflexive response from guilty politicians which only serves to incense and provoke the blood-thirsty media pack. It's like kicking a hornet's nest, and it never works.

(2) Cast aspersions on the accuser. Rush Limbaugh mocked her name, said it rhymed with "by or buy(?) a lick" — amazing how such a juvenile guttersnipe can make tens of millions from it. Raise doubts based on her personal appearance, demeanor, and dress. (You can't judge a book by its cover, except that you do.) This is a favorite lecherous Republican line of attack, fond as the are of justifying rape and sexual assault asserting a woman invited it by the way she was dressed. It's always the wanton, fallen woman's fault. The media says Bialek is "credible" but their standards in these matters are lax. I'm guilty as charged, too, but the hair covering her left eye really bugged me, like nails scraping a chalkboard. It's a pet peeve that didn't go unnoticed to a reporter or photographer in the room who asked her to move the wayward hair. If you're going to have a bad hair day, don't do it by design. Sometimes this works because the accused's supporters are asked, insinuatingly, to make a subjective judgment of her credibility based entirely on the superficiality of her outward appearance. For those predisposed toward Herman Cain, that could be enough.

(3) Blame the media, blame the opponent campaigns, blame liberals, blame Hollywood, blame the poor, blame the unemployed, blame the French, Greece and Italy, blame Obama, blame Occupy Wall Street, blame Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid, blame the economy ... In short, blame everyone and everything but yourself. That could work if not for, as the POLITICO politicos breathing an almost audible sigh of relief said, "we now have a face and a name." This train has left the station, Herman.

(4) Finally, though, the only avenue open to Herman Cain if he wants to ensure his campaign's ultimate survivability is this: COME CLEAN, Herman. Tell the truth, admit mistakes of "judgment" were made, ask forgiveness for your sins and throw yourself on the mercy of your Christian (in-name-only) supporters. Evangelicals are big on the redemption and salvation of sinners. It's like an escape clause that allows them to be Christ-like and sinful hypocrites at the same time. Everything is forgiven as long as you're not one of those highly ethical, utterly moral "secular humanists" and "socialists." Remember, reaffirming "In God We Trust" is far more important than passing a jobs bill that will put hundreds of thousands of unemployed Americans to work.

If that fails, Herman Cain can always try the nuclear option: 'Bubba Big Dog' Bill "I never had sexual relations with that woman" Clinton. But I wouldn't advise it. In truth, don't even go there, Herman, because, well, you're no Bill Clinton.